A lot of negative...

I actually really dislike using my blog to write about the not-so-nice-things, but, ja, I need to talk about it (sort of)?

Things just went crazy all of a sudden. Not that 'crazy' is the right word, just, that it went 'heart sore'.

My Oupa passed away, and I miss him. It's been nearly five months since he's gone, and there is not a single day that goes by, that I don't think about him. Death is so final, but we all know that. My BMF just 'vanished', and I miss him soo very much. My BFF moved to another city, very far away, and now I'm in the process of being bankrupt/insolvent/blacklisted or whatever you can call it.

I failed this. My dream. The one thing I wanted to do all my life.

And it hurts, ALL of it! Not just failing at my dream...


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So many questions...

Funny how life is...

As soon as you think your hopes and dreams are gonna be heard, it takes a nosedive and you feel as if the train is going off its rail.

Aahh there are a few things, very important things I hope and pray for constantly, as I'm sure millions of other people do, but sometimes I'm scared and nervous that its not in God's plan for me.

I know He will do what's right and what's supposed to be, yes, I know.

God? Please? You know my heart...

Amen!


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Love...

Joyce Meyer ministries wrote:

It isn't always easy to love, but God demands it. Love the unlovable in your life today.

Read 1 Cor 13:7


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Eina...

I'm very tired, really. I'm dreaming of a beach holiday, to lay in the sun, cool off in the sea and to just be lazy! I can do that for at least two weeks. Wouldn't it be nice?

But I don't have that luxury - yet...

I've made up my mind to go back to the way I was. Physically. I'm getting rid of this long hair tomorrow, and I can't wait.

They say a change is as good as a holiday, so I'm doing just that!

And?
I miss D...


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In time...

It's amazing how a wild stranger walks into your life and 'switch' on these feelings. Even though I didn't know it was locked up inside me.

His name is David, a born and bred french man. A child of God. You can see it radiate out of him, you know? We start chatting about this and that, about waiting for God to send you your true 'partner', helping others etc. And then just before he leaves, he said, that the Holy Spirit showed him how badly I need healing, healing from past things, and I need to leave them behind, before God can give me the good things He has planned for me, the things I'm passing by. He takes my hands and prays for me, and walks out.

Just like that.

There I stare after this man with tears running down my face, because I just can't help it.

Now I need to figure out what it is I need to let go of. I have a good idea, but there are a few in the line-up. Its a wish-you-well-as-i-wave-it-goodbye type of scenario...

They say time heals. I don't think time does.


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'No Name Brand'...

Great, just great. Up and awake since 3am again. Tried coffee, watching TV and doing the dishes.

It seems like sleep is not my best friend at the moment. Ja?

I hope and pray that God will answer my prayers. There is so much I miss and hope for....you know?


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